Still H*O*R*N*Y

In d present condition i am.
i couldn't help but scroll through my phone book.
thinking of who could be my booty call if things got too bad.
and then i remembered.
oh my weepy baby.
from when i met him some years ago.
the only problem i had with him was the fact that he could outcry me.
d first day we met: he cried
d first day we kissed:he wailed
d first day he climaxed:he sobbed
any thing apart from that he had my pass mark.

***********************************************************


The location is just convenient.
as he stays in my neighborhood.
its not as if he is charismatic.
or that i can take him home.
but he could suck a storm up.
and after i had tutored him.
he doesn't kiss so much with his saliva.
i knew if it got too bad, i could always count on him.
to give me anyway i wanted.
cos he has a listening ear.
and a fondness for doing it the way i wanted.

************************************************************


So i picked my phone.
fortunately his numbers were still there.
i mashed the green button down.
and it almost became a video call.
i cautioned my voice.
you must not sound horny.
hello. he said.
and this judas down there.
went into over drive.
i mean gear1 straight to 5.
hi. nee.
how are you doing?
i said.
Oh baby. he replied.
have been good.
but you were wrong not to call me back.

***********************************************************


**FLASHBACK**


I remembered d last time i called.
i hid my number.
he said he was in church(my weepy brother in the lord)
but i didn't call him back cos i didn't feel horny.

**BACK TO PRESENT**


Jo ma binu. i said.
but you sef no try.y do u always lose my number.
bla bla bla bla..his usual pathetic story.
while my credit burnt away.
ok,ok,ok,ok
long and short.

************************************************************


So when next are you going to be around.i asked.
I will check you up tomorrow.
and my judas screamed for joy.
i wonder if getting a head is not going to ruin my celibacy.
OR IS IT?.
I should be able to give him one too.
SHOULDN'T I?.
but then he went into a realm i dint expect.
Parrot, u know i love you.


*****************************



***SILENCE**

******************************

Parrot!
Hello!
Parrot!


***SHIT***


Even judas kept quiet.
cos it knows i don't like the "L" word.
Lust i can take.
but Love,most definitely not.

************************************************************


Hello hello.
look nee. call me back later.
something just came up.
i couldn't get off the phone fast enough.

************************************************************


P.S- was that too long?

P.S.S- malaria actually doesn't erase lust.

P.S.S.S- and Happy easter gone.


*************************************************************

Am soooooooooo H*o*r*n*y

i know its been a long time since i blogged but seriously i need help.
i know my mother did not raise me up to start acting like dis.
evrytime i walk past a fine dude.
i cant help but sigh.
i scope his torso and butt.
am a sucker for a tight bum anyday.
but what gives me concern is dat.
now i go as far as checking out d crotch size.
Am so horny nowadays i can't think straight.
Every romance novel i read leaves me hungry.
every love scene a lesson in wetness.
i just hope its a phase that passes.
because if i act on what my coochie is telling me.
am going to fuck myself blind.
my mother spent too long giving me talks.
and have kept myself for too long to sucumb.
but for now.
am dealing with my groin-searching eyes.
and spending more time in church.
saying dear Lord please wipe all fine boys.
from my vicinity and give my pussy the grace.
to know when to breathe.
and when to clench.

Back with a double dilemma

even though you have not asked I am hale and hearty and still searching for a guy that can bring my emotions under control...dats a roundabout way of saying I was alone on vals day..terrific..now i have nothing to write except to lament my single state...
The truth is i have met two terrific guys..One is yoruba and the other Edo..long nd short..they are different in evry way..
*complexion
*finances
*height
*ambition
*charisma
One cries the other doesnt and you know how much i hate tears in a man but he is so cute ..
One is my tender age and the other matured..and ladies you know the age mate boyfriend is never ready when you are to go to the next level..but the one my age is my tribe and that counts for a lot because my parents are tribalists and will not allow me to marry outside my tribe..
I call one silentnight and the other endurance(for what he suffered in the hands of his ex-gal)
Holla at me if you think i have just reason to be concerned about tribal differences..i have already lost husband-material cos he is igbo and when i mentioned it to my father jokingly he almost had a heart attack..