10/17/08

TEE..My actual first love

I had "D dream" again..it's pretty scary cos dere has never been and there is still no indication that it will ever happen..
I first noticed TEE in my 300l in school..I used to go and play lawn-tennis almost every other evening and he used to come and play volley ball. I admit i was drawn to the court initially because of all those fit,muscular and sweaty male torso flying all over the place..The two courts been adjacent to each other..but gradually as I was not getting any better at lawn tennis..I was encouraged to change over to volleyballing..
It wasn't a simple transition..it wasn't as easy as it looked..infact,as much of a tomboy as I was:gettin hit regularly by the ball in the name of spiking and blocking wasn't my best idea of sport or staying fit..but I was determined to learn..At that point,I must have been the creamiest gal on court cos I had a bevy of followers always seeing me off to the hostel or trying to..but
TEE was never one them..this was the first time that I was attracted to a guy and he wouldn't even look at me or smile at my antics..it was hellish..
At first, i stayed away from the court thinking: he isn't even all that cream and tall sef..but later the fighter in me made me go back to court and start working on him..i fell on him..pushed him..said hi and did everything I could without embarrassing myself, just to get his attention and finally I did..he started talking to me cos his friend wanted to toast me but I made it a clear competition as i dictated my number to both of them..but when his friend called I warned him severly not to call me again,while i encouraged
TEE to let us txt chat..
That was how we became friends..we got to know each other and it was always fun knowing that after he saw me off ,his messages will start coming in..he started playing much more better on court(i think he was showing off for me or my infatuation made him seem better)..I started missing some evening classes just to go see him and I think that's when my g.p dropped..
Then one dark,nepaless n windy night in my room...we kissed..GBAO GBAO SWSIHH GBRAGER...It was electric,thunderous and explosive............................................a minute of silence to remember that kisss....................................................I mean he is your typical, sporty nerd..he had never been to a party talk less of a club but he could dismantle a laptop in less than 10 minutes...My world was shaken..I mean I expected a clumsy and somewhat soggy kiss but it wasn't to be...He was not too worldly too so we kissed for close to an hour:thirty minutes..for me thats a huge record cos am not particularly fond of mouth to mouth resuscitation..That was how we became kiss buddies..
At that time,I was so full of myself and thought I was all that..I mean if I wanted anyone I was
sure I could get him..I had a toaster at that point..his name..MUY..he was serving in Asaba and he seemed my type..at times he would call when I was with TEE and I would free my lips and pick the call..usually the call ended with "I miss u to", "Can't wait to see you"and yes "I like you too"(I can't stand d word "love")..Anyway.all these while,I never knew it was affecting TEE, the way I was saying all those things..but since he never actually asked me out and knew about MUY,i felt he was ok with been kiss buddies..
We kept this new status hidden from our fellow volleyballing mates and individual friends..mainly because I insisted..by this time we were in 400l,2nd semester and I was already thinking ahead to what will happen after school..he didnt seem like he would feature in the nearest future..distance and ambition was bound to tear us apart..so I decided to ease away gradually...It didn't really hurt at that time but later I felt it cause I realised that you don't know what you have got till its gone..

Our friendship became stilted..we would talk..for a long time we won't..i went through a series of phone loss and i am not good at memorising numbers..he would call and I would say who is this? he would get angry that I had deleted his number..no matter what I said I would sound like I was lying..That was when I first had the dream...
That first time, i kept it to myself...the second time,i told a friend she laughed...the third time ,I told him and he said am I serious..in a mockingway..but this morning it happened again after we have not been in touch for sometime..and hours after..a message came in..
THE MESSAGE

TEE:- Hi...hw ur day?(5naira)
PAR:- Fine.urs?(5 naira)
TEE:- Aite...where u @(5 naira)
PAR:-AK bt off 2 lagos 2moro(was expecting an invitation at this point)(5 naira)
TEE:- K...safe trip then.Jst chekn up on u.Sleep tait(5 naira)
PAR:-(shocked bt wit pride intact) Thanks.I appreciate it.(5 naira)
30Naira and my dream was shattered again..I could smell the indifference..as if he was just trying to do his part in keeping in touch....
You are probably wondering where I am going to with this jargon..I just have to get this off my mind..I know
TEE may never read this (hiccup) , may already have someone else (wailing now)...I am too proud to tell him like this(hiccup) but I DO LOVE YOU (huge sob) and
AM SORRY..
1.sorry for not seeing what a gem you are..
2.sorry for not respecting the love you had for me..
3.sorry for forgetting your number..
4.sorry for throwing your care away..
5.sorry for all the times i didn't keep in touch..
6.sorry for all the times i said "love" in front of you and not to you..
7.sorry for not taking you to your first party as I promised..
8.sorry for letting my stupid pride get in my way
9.sorry for the times I was not there for you
10.sorry, for I keep having this dream,that one day I will walk down the aisle to meet you***

7 comments:

Buttercup said...

Oh wow...

If u r still in touch like u implied, its not too late to tell him how u feel(if u can)..

Good luck babe!

Danny Bagucci said...

Nerdy guys may not neccesarily be quick on the uptake on matters like this.. Hope u get the chance to let the chap know how u feel tho.. Would be a shame that all this chemistry would just go down the drain... Cheers

talesandtallies said...

aww... dis story is so moving. if youre still in touch with him, jst tellin me. I can imagine hw u feel, he may feel d same way... derz no harm tryin

plz, if u do tell us hw it goes

Parakeet said...

*Then one dark,nepaless n windy night in my room...we kissed..GBAO GBAO SWSIHH GBRAGER.*

Hahahahaha!...now that's funny. And kissing buddy? Me never hear that phrase before.

Shame though that you loved someone that much and blew it!

Parrot said...

@buttercup- I dont know how to tell him again..am so whipped
@danny- I did all the way and when he woke up,i now fucked up..tanks sha..dat chemistry may have expired on his part
@talesandtallies-i av let him know i still love him but i dnt think there is anyway i can go back and do anything..hmm.
@parakeet-big shame on me oh..dere is kissing buddy oh..maybe u neva kiss someone without passing that stage before..
@All-do u think i should tell him to read this?

tommeh said...

It ain't hard.. just keep dreaming! lol nice, though.

Parrot said...

its hard@tommeh\where u been man?