10 Ys'

10 Whys'

Why is it easier to scratch mtn's 400 and 750 naira recharge cards while the 200 naira for poor people like me gets mangled if you so much as scratch it with a fingernail?

Why must dreadlocked people sit beside you and try their best to get their filthy heads close to yours?

Why have guys forsaken good old romance and try to skip straight from meeting you to banging you?

Why do ladies like embracing stupid fashion trends-talk about the latest close cut weave on style with something in the side of your head in a different colour that looks like a flower sprouting and the high waist jeans that is obviously not for everyone?

Why does Obama look even more handsome now that he is the President- Elect of the United States of America?

Why are some Nigerians acting like they have something to do with his been elected and that means automatic admission into the states for Africans?

Why oh why am I scared of sex?

Why do i think of hellfire and the life after in the night?

Why do i resolve to be a better person in the night, to watch my language and yet wake up cursing whatever woke me up?

Why the hell do people act so pious in church when we know where and what some are up to after church?

becoming a woman pt2-my first kiss

Many remember their first kiss with a shiver,feelings of nostalgia or disgust.. I remember mine with a shudder..5 yrs older than me,he shouldnt have taken advantage of my lack of exposure..i was seeking admission into the same school where he was studying medicine..he wasn't even fly or all that well-dressed considering that they were rolling in dough. He took me like a little sister and i saw him as a big brother..if only i had known(sorry this is beginning to sound morbid, but it was that bad). He was the most clueless,least handsome and richest of all the boys that used to roll in my estate(we don leave razz hood by then).
He had one cute mazda like this and we use to roll a little together..there wasn't much to see in town then..just hang a little here and there..drive here and there and den go back home..did i fail to mention that he stayed 3 houses away from me..Anyway we would drive into his house,pack the car and he ll secure the dogs so i could come down..at times i will go in and see a movie or just go home straight..
This fateful day,ti mo nwi, he buzzed me and told me to come over that he had something to discuss about my admission and sturvs..even though he knew naught about how i was handling my admission,i decided to go and hear what he might have to say,afterall he had been there for close to four years..when i got to his place,i chilled in the parlour as usual,(so u won't say wetin i go find for im room)..he came out from the shower i guess cos he had a towel around his neck and he was in his boxer short..which was a pretty normal sight to me,haven grown up with four senior brothers..
He sat next to me and was like "yeah you have to be quick about this admission so that we can be rolling together in school" I was like "Egbon tani mo tun fe roll pelu" meaning "Brother, who else do i want to roll with"..he was now like "fi yen le"(leave all that),je ko ye e pe mo feran e"(understand that i love you" . my mind just went blank with shock,it was as if my uncle or some old man was asking me out.
I guess my mouth snapped open cos the next thing i knew his saliva was all over the place..his tongue was in my mouth and he was practically brushing or should I say flossing my mouth..I had not kissed before so I didnt know what the ideal kiss should be like but I knew this was definitely off.slimey,salivery and tonguey..it lasted for barely 5 seconds before i regained my senses..5 seconds i could have picked a virus up or something..5 seconds any grand illusion of how romantic a first kiss should be was shattered..
I felt violated..
My lips had been disflowered by this ogre and it wasn't even an experience to savor but a nightmare.I was just 16yrs and I had no one to talk to been the only gal and the last child...my female cousin's were a bit of the fire and brimstone type and i didn't see any help coming from there..but they say "when a door closes a window opens"..what opened within that week wasn't just a window..it was a huge gate opening..but thats another part you know..anyhoo i got out of that house as fast as my legs could take me..i did give him another chance to redeem himself in my 2nd year but i realised "his leopard never change skin" it was still a shower and flossing kiss..and me i no fit date person wey no fit kiss so i started avoiding him since then..we still see on the street once in a while but its always 'hello' 'hi'
..but till this day i still shudder at the horror of that kiss.

Becoming a woman pt1- A series of my quests and adventures

"D way to a man's heart is through his stomach!" I can still hear my Gran squeaking into my Aunt's ears. "yeah right" Like we don't know better..The way to a man's heart is through his manhood...
I grew up looking much like a washboard so I came into my sexuality pretty late. For long, I had actually thought I had a thing for girls like me. I went to an all-girls boarding school and for some reasons, the girls thought i looked like a boy and treated me as such. I was always fun and humuorous so they all wanted to chill with me..My corner was always filled like crazy, i never worried about what to eat cos the seniors took care of me, i didnt quit understand what drew people to me..even now i still can't fathom.
Now when I look back am always amazed,amused and grateful for my naivete..amazed i could have been so blind, amused at all the antics back then and grateful because if I had known better I may have sinned..the seniors must have known i didnt know jack cos they left me out of all the crazy things that used to go on back then in the boarding house.. I knew next to nothing about guys, sex and the female anatomy. Growing up in a razz neighbourhood, i remember we used to poke our fore-finger into our fist to indicate the sexual act. I knew what the d*** was and I knew I had a P****. I knew they were supposed to go into each other and as far as I was concerned that was about it.How little did I know.The breast to me,wasn't even part of the whole game and kissing was a concept I had gleaned from the romance novels I had breathed in. Anything else was hear-say.
The first petals of desire began to unfurl in me the first time I was playing with my brother's friend.It was rough play.I was 13 and he was 14 and both of us weren't much to write home about in timesof physical development.. I didn't have pimples but he had to show you how bad he must have looked then. "give me my novel or i ll grab your ****" i shouted at him: "I dare you" he shouted right back.. I grabbed, he grabbed and we both went hard. My n****, his ****. I felt a little dampness between my legs and I though "what in heavens just happened".. It wasn't a deliberate thing because he looked as shocked as I felt. We removed our hands from each other, he gave me back my novel and left immediately..that was the first and last time i a guy will ever touch me and leave just like that.
For a very long time after that,say for four years,I kept to myself and seriously became aware of a lot of things. I read vicariously and now all the mills and boons I had been reading started to make a lot of sense.It gave me more of a worldly look than i was entitled to.I became brash and outspoken and the quiet 'me' never resurfaced. I would gather girls around me and i wil give them a lecture on what to expect. To them I was a veritable fountain of information, even though I knew I wasn't going near all that shit for a very long time, I would exaggerate the pains of been deflowered and play down on the sexual fulfillment they claimed came after. I covered my fear of sex with a loud mouthed discourse on everything raw and dirty. If there was an argument or disagreement over something remotely sex related,I was the lady with the answers...to be continued

TEE..My actual first love

I had "D dream" again..it's pretty scary cos dere has never been and there is still no indication that it will ever happen..
I first noticed TEE in my 300l in school..I used to go and play lawn-tennis almost every other evening and he used to come and play volley ball. I admit i was drawn to the court initially because of all those fit,muscular and sweaty male torso flying all over the place..The two courts been adjacent to each other..but gradually as I was not getting any better at lawn tennis..I was encouraged to change over to volleyballing..
It wasn't a simple transition..it wasn't as easy as it looked..infact,as much of a tomboy as I was:gettin hit regularly by the ball in the name of spiking and blocking wasn't my best idea of sport or staying fit..but I was determined to learn..At that point,I must have been the creamiest gal on court cos I had a bevy of followers always seeing me off to the hostel or trying to..but TEE was never one them..this was the first time that I was attracted to a guy and he wouldn't even look at me or smile at my antics..it was hellish..
At first, i stayed away from the court thinking: he isn't even all that cream and tall sef..but later the fighter in me made me go back to court and start working on him..i fell on him..pushed him..said hi and did everything I could without embarrassing myself, just to get his attention and finally I did..he started talking to me cos his friend wanted to toast me but I made it a clear competition as i dictated my number to both of them..but when his friend called I warned him severly not to call me again,while i encouraged TEE to let us txt chat..
That was how we became friends..we got to know each other and it was always fun knowing that after he saw me off ,his messages will start coming in..he started playing much more better on court(i think he was showing off for me or my infatuation made him seem better)..I started missing some evening classes just to go see him and I think that's when my g.p dropped..
Then one dark,nepaless n windy night in my room...we kissed..GBAO GBAO SWSIHH GBRAGER...It was electric,thunderous and explosive............................................a minute of silence to remember that kisss....................................................I mean he is your typical, sporty nerd..he had never been to a party talk less of a club but he could dismantle a laptop in less than 10 minutes...My world was shaken..I mean I expected a clumsy and somewhat soggy kiss but it wasn't to be...He was not too worldly too so we kissed for close to an hour:thirty minutes..for me thats a huge record cos am not particularly fond of mouth to mouth resuscitation..That was how we became kiss buddies..
At that time,I was so full of myself and thought I was all that..I mean if I wanted anyone I was sure I could get him..I had a toaster at that point..his name..MUY..he was serving in Asaba and he seemed my type..at times he would call when I was with TEE and I would free my lips and pick the call..usually the call ended with "I miss u to", "Can't wait to see you"and yes "I like you too"(I can't stand d word "love")..Anyway.all these while,I never knew it was affecting TEE, the way I was saying all those things..but since he never actually asked me out and knew about MUY,i felt he was ok with been kiss buddies..
We kept this new status hidden from our fellow volleyballing mates and individual friends..mainly because I insisted..by this time we were in 400l,2nd semester and I was already thinking ahead to what will happen after school..he didnt seem like he would feature in the nearest future..distance and ambition was bound to tear us apart..so I decided to ease away gradually...It didn't really hurt at that time but later I felt it cause I realised that you don't know what you have got till its gone..
Our friendship became stilted..we would talk..for a long time we won't..i went through a series of phone loss and i am not good at memorising numbers..he would call and I would say who is this? he would get angry that I had deleted his number..no matter what I said I would sound like I was lying..That was when I first had the dream...
That first time, i kept it to myself...the second time,i told a friend she laughed...the third time ,I told him and he said am I serious..in a mockingway..but this morning it happened again after we have not been in touch for sometime..and hours after..a message came in..
THE MESSAGE
TEE:- Hi...hw ur day?(5naira)
PAR:- Fine.urs?(5 naira)
TEE:- Aite...where u @(5 naira)
PAR:-AK bt off 2 lagos 2moro(was expecting an invitation at this point)(5 naira)
TEE:- K...safe trip then.Jst chekn up on u.Sleep tait(5 naira)
PAR:-(shocked bt wit pride intact) Thanks.I appreciate it.(5 naira)
30Naira and my dream was shattered again..I could smell the indifference..as if he was just trying to do his part in keeping in touch....
You are probably wondering where I am going to with this jargon..I just have to get this off my mind..I know TEE may never read this (hiccup) , may already have someone else (wailing now)...I am too proud to tell him like this(hiccup) but I DO LOVE YOU (huge sob) and
AM SORRY..
1.sorry for not seeing what a gem you are..
2.sorry for not respecting the love you had for me..
3.sorry for forgetting your number..
4.sorry for throwing your care away..
5.sorry for all the times i didn't keep in touch..
6.sorry for all the times i said "love" in front of you and not to you..
7.sorry for not taking you to your first party as I promised..
8.sorry for letting my stupid pride get in my way
9.sorry for the times I was not there for you
10.sorry, for I keep having this dream,that one day I will walk down the aisle to meet you***

%Types of Men on Lagos Street..

At 11:30pm, after taking a can of POWER HORSE that I stole from under my brother's bed(not a creative hiding place is it?), I find i couldn't sleep and nothing will calm me but a spot of writing..what is there to write? About dumb relationships..guys you shouldn't even have given your number or the good ones you let go away..In my 23 years, I have seen a lot and I may not have much experience or stories to tell but I am a good listener..I especially have a friend who loves to talk about hers' and other people's relationships and sex life especially when she is a little tipsy or exceptionally drunk..In all this I have come to my own conclusion of a few of the type of guys that exist now in the streets..signify if you see your ex or boyfriend here oh and to the guys if you find yourself on this list..

1.Weepy and emotional-he is the type that thanks you for the kisses or the sex,whichever the case maybe..he doesn't ever blame himself for any problem in the relationship..he always claims not to have much experience and you can make him a better person..But even after 3 years, he still crying when it suits him..either after a climax or when accused of something.His dreams are always lofty for you,we ll travel, buy you a good car, get you a swell job so you can have some pocket change..but months after you are still asking him to help you pass your cv round..he has the connections but who is he gonna cry on when you get all busy and shit,so you can be sure that job is not forthcoming.

2.The guy from the club-maybe its just me, but have never heard anything good from couples who hooked up in the club..you lady are dressed up in your fine skimpy skirt or bumshot as it suits you..with your-barely-covering-shit-top and your excessive makeup as if anyone can really see it under that horrible disco light..anyway this guy dressed to the nine,walks up to you asks you for a dance, offers you a drink and then you are all over him in the spirit of the song..songs like "pretty pussy","lick it ****" you know those type of songs that have you going down and packing it back up with your behind..you have got the guy against the wall having a taste of what he hasn't paid for..and when he offers to take you home you don't mind..he drops you off gets your number and you think whao!!he may be the one..hmm if your daylight look doesn't scare him and he comes back, he is only there to finish what you started..

3.The ones with the cars-no gal i repeat no lady..fine in her own right has not had a car stop beside her with the same pickup line
Dude:- " where are you heading towards?"
Fine gal:- "just down the road"
Dude:- "Can I drop you?"
Fine gal:- (gradually walking) "no thanks, am really not going far"
Dude:- "but I can drop you"
Fine gal:- "Am sure you are busy,not to worry"
Dude:- (wheedling) "but a fine gal like you should not be walking under this sun/rain"
Fine gal:-(yeah right) "Hmm" But no thanks
Dude:-(sighs)"Can I have your number then, I am Alaigboran, Ceo of Alaigbaran and Sons limited"
Fine gal:-(with phone in plain sight)"I just lost my set"
Dude:- "but!!"
Fine gal:-(scathing look and moving faster now)
Dude:- "ok! ok!!..here is my complimentary card,you can get me on any of my four numbers.
Fine gal:-(flings into her bag without a second look) "Sure"
Dude:- "Are you sure I can't drop you?"
Fine gal:- "Don't you get? What part don't you get? Am okay, you are embarassing me and yourself"
Dude:- "Alright alright, don't shout, am going, bye.make sure you call me"
(Drives off, but stops shortly in front to help a lady in tight jeans get to her destination:afterall its his civic duty to see that ladies don't get burnt by the sun or beaten by the rain..he is not daunted by your refusal)
Need I say more?.Warning:Be careful what ride you accept, the tales one hears now are blood curdling, especially all those guys that are desperate to make money...if you are a chronic free rider..only go for old men who you can at least drag the steering with..just saying..I have a friend in UniLag who has never raised her hand up and brought it down without a car screeching to a halt..But that's a story for anoda time..

4.The Banker or the office guys- Am busy throughout the week, this work is killing me, I have no time for myself...these are few complaints you get from them..Its a known fact that bankers are womanisers, where they get the time is what bothers me..I had a married man who was asking me out..he worked in a bank and had a loving wife and two kids..but he still managed to drive down from island to see me whenever i beckoned..If not for the fear of God and my future marriage..I would have taken his wife's number and let her know how useless he is..Another banker-toaster was so busy he only had time to see me on saturday, but that was if I could come to his friends' flat..what happened to even wining and dining? What happened to his own crib? When did relationship become all about Wham Bam..hello..bam bam.gtg..nah I would rather the self employed..I heard bankers are stingy anyways.hmmm.

5.The Smoker- this particular one is a friend's tale to tell..when she met him, he was the most irritating person she had ever seen..he chained smoke and took a wrap of weed once in a while..he was black and short on good looks..Today they are the closest couple have seen around..under all that smoke was a shy, sensitive and cool guy who really couldnt say much around ladies..but since he managed to stammer his way into her heart,a pack a day became too much..Whoever said "never judge a book by its cover" was obviously his mother.

Plain Gals Talk...

A normal yahoo chat conversation between two friends ##### and $$$$$..At least it started out normal and went crazy from there..If you are have been reading my blog you can feel in some gaps...I have done my best not to touch anything except edit the names involved..
WARNING: The conversation you are about to read contains some dirty and plain language..if you are below 16, am sorry..but you have to grow up sometime...
Thursday, April 17,2008
YAHOO MESSENGER

$$$$$: bebe
#####: oti o
#####: tani mori yi
#####: $$$$$$$
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: how far now
$$$$$: whats going on
#####: mo wa
#####: kilonsele
$$$$$: ko si oh
$$$$$: school is just really stressful
#####: pele
$$$$$: ko easy
#####: u wey u suppose dey serve with us now
#####: boya zamfara lo ba wa
$$$$$: lai lai
$$$$$: coming from outside nigeria, you get to choose where u want to serve
#####: ahhh
#####: even den
#####: ur eye go still see for camp
$$$$$: ehn den i will choose lag
$$$$$: am not an aje butter now, i'll hustle
$$$$$: hussle
#####: lag sef
#####: wel lag camp na soso enjoyment
$$$$$: for real
$$$$$: i can't wait to go to camp
$$$$$: so kilon shele
$$$$$: awon bys nko
$$$$$: boys
#####: won wa
#####: i dey find husband now
#####: not boyfriend
$$$$$: oga oh
$$$$$: God would help you with ur mission
#####: u nko
#####: al d guys wey correct dat i meet
$$$$$: nothing dey happen
#####: if not ibo den muslim
#####: and i cnt marry muslim
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: na wa oh
#####: bt to leave dat guy hard
#####: just too caring
$$$$$: well me am not even looking for common boyfriend
#####: wat are u lukin for
#####: LOVER
$$$$$: nothing
#####: lol
$$$$$: at all oh
#####: mehn all that relationship thing is stress
#####: too much
#####: me wey i no even like to dey hang wit boy for longa dan 2hrs
#####: dem dey tire
#####: me
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: abi oh
$$$$$: there arent any good boys for my side sef
$$$$$: so i am not too worried
#####: wel chill
#####: beta boys dey naija
$$$$$: so i hear
#####: at least dem still get sense
#####: not like al dos jand boys tryn to ayaj as many pussies as dey can
#####: bone guy for dere oh
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: wo na them sabi abeg
$$$$$: so who do u know that is our mate that is getting married, cos thats the in thing now
#####: well
#####: i dunt know
#####: dem get boyf sef wey u dey talk marriage
#####: maybe y****** is close sha
#####: dat o**** wey just deu fool herself
$$$$$: oh yea was even chatting with e**** yesterday
$$$$$: please who is she with
#####: and did u hear wedding bells ring
$$$$$: still that same t**** girl
#####: still fooling herself ova dat t****
$$$$$: no at all oh, e**** wey dey come do masters for sept
#####: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
$$$$$: wot
#####: mi o mo oh
#####: bt dey are still strong sha
$$$$$: yea they are
$$$$$: well i think its still coded am not sure,but he told me he is coming in sept
#####: okkkkkkkkkkk
$$$$$: so any gist whats happening for ur side
#####: nuttin much
#####: i just lay low for my side
#####: i dey teach english,lit n computer
#####: dey neva see omowe b4
#####: dem wan kill me
$$$$$: lol..na wa oh. for which village be this
#####: ikenne.;ilu awolowo
#####: in ogun
$$$$$: seen
#####: bawo now
#####: o******* nko
$$$$$: him dey oh
$$$$$: still saw him last weekend
#####: oh good
#####: i believe dat afro has gone to rest
$$$$$: it has not oh..its even worse sef
#####: ahhhhh
#####: but at least he shaves his beard
$$$$$: ojebi
$$$$$: y****** a***** nko?
$$$$$: do u see her often
#####: nope
#####: av not seen her in like 4yrs
$$$$$: are u for real
#####: yes i am
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: t*** v****** nko...o ti pe ti mo ti gburo e
#####: o wambe
#####: awon ti ife
$$$$$: abi oh
$$$$$: can't wait to see you guys this year and u better have my time this time around
#####: o gal
#####: am waiting for u
#####: na me n u go rock lagos
$$$$$: na so oh
#####: infact i don even get guy for u sef lol
$$$$$: lol..who is this guy ih
$$$$$: i hope he is fine
#####: emi awa fun e ni ugly guy
#####: laiye laiye
$$$$$: mo gbo e oh
#####: gbaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
$$$$$: there is this guy am talking to right now although am not ready for a relationship but within the next few months, something might just happen.
$$$$$: so i might have a boyfriend by then
#####: hmmm
#####: ko da ise oluwa duro
$$$$$: ise esu
#####: ni emi abi
$$$$$: wasup
#####: nibo lo wa
#####: anyway u are always talkin to a guy and den
$$$$$: library
#####: i hear nuttin
#####: shey kin fun ni oko ni london
$$$$$: u are not serious
$$$$$: oko wo lo fe fumi ni london
#####: aahhh
#####: ma try mi oh
#####: shey kin fix e bai bai
$$$$$: ehn now
$$$$$: no wahala
#####: ok oh
$$$$$: no one razz bobo oh
#####: what INSULT
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: oya sorry
#####: hmm
$$$$$: wot
#####: mi n razz bobos don part since 2004
$$$$$: ture oh wetin happen to dat bobo dat used to come and sit in ur room in queens hal all the time
#####: cnt remember any bobo frm 100l
#####: light guy like dis abi
$$$$$: yes
#####: ahh
#####: dat guy cn suck breast
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lol
#####: seriously
#####: dat was al he did
#####: kiss kiss n suck suc
#####: he wasnt al dat gud wit d kisses bt he will just latch on to my tiny booby de
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: thats too funny
#####: seriously
#####: no one knew wat i was goin thru
$$$$$: what were u going thru oh
#####: it was heaven on earth
#####: and den
#####: tryin
#####: to keep
#####: urself frm havn sex
#####: it was crazy
$$$$$: and have u managed to fall into the whole sex thing now
#####: lol
#####: dats a tricky question
$$$$$: why
$$$$$: u are a v sturvs or not..simple question
#####: why are u so desperate to know
#####: i have a phobia for sex
#####: and an eye for good foreplay
$$$$$: why do u have a phobia for sex
$$$$$: lol
#####: my first boyf dat attempted to enter had a curved dick and dint manage to enter well,inspite of his so called verbal experience
#####: it was painful bt he dint manage to do it
#####: we were att it for hours
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lmao
$$$$$: na wa oh...werent u turned off at some point,being at it for hours is a helluva long time
#####: at first i was wet
#####: den super dry
#####: for months afta dat
#####: i cldnt get turned on
$$$$$: lol
#####: i broke up with him afta dat
#####: he still wants us to get back
$$$$$: eya poor guy
#####: he wants to finish d butchering
$$$$$: o no one has taken over from where he left off
#####: but i dnt tink he cn ever turn me on again
#####: oh gal
$$$$$: lol
#####: d ting just hard me oh
#####: and my body dey find am but to clear dat tin
#####: na wahala
$$$$$: i dont get..now am lost
#####: ode ni e ni
$$$$$: lol
#####: d flesh is weak but am scared
$$$$$: when u are speaking pidgin and am trying hard to dechiper
#####: i asked a doctor if i cld clear it medically
$$$$$: well then u dont have problems
#####: abi obo ni e ni
#####: wen did pidgin bcum hard
$$$$$: lol..
$$$$$: am sure its about getting the guy that turns u on big time
#####: super big time
#####: wit a straight n smalldick
$$$$$: i know the right person
#####: u will inaki
$$$$$: huh
#####: who?
#####: i tink u saw d small part
$$$$$: dont worry let december come
#####: lol
#####: ok so i shld kip in mind dat december am goin to have sex.lol
$$$$$: yes keep in mind
$$$$$: good sex for that matter
#####: personal experience?
$$$$$: he is my friend, he lives in jand and is always in naija for xmas as well so dont worry i'll hook u up but there are no strings attached
#####: lol
$$$$$: no catching of feelings
#####: i go run frm u december
#####: blieve me
$$$$$: kilode
#####: i swear if u breathe dat am a virgin to any1
#####: ill kill u
#####: nt even to t***
#####: ma pa eh
$$$$$: well i still am so its not a big deal
$$$$$: the whole sex thing doesnt trip me
#####: jo
#####: if u hear me speak here
#####: ull undastand
#####: as far as am concerned am d baddest
$$$$$: trust me i dont think so
$$$$$: when it comes to quaves...yea i love it but one minute am all excited and the next i want to sleep
#####: lol
#####: sleep
#####: sleep sef small,
#####: u neva claim malaria b4
$$$$$: lol..how
#####: my boyf is ingenious
#####: he has found ways to satisfy himself
#####: he is always coming and i wonder if he is not a fan of premature ejaculatn
#####: anytin i do he ll oh mi god oh migod
$$$$$: i love being quaved but when it comes to me quaving the guy, i back out. once my excitment has died down, thats it for the guy oh
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lol
#####: stingy
#####: ko da ko da
#####: sanu ori
#####: abi sanu d***
$$$$$: i know but its too bad
$$$$$: i bet he can find other ways to satisfy himself when am gone
#####: lol
#####: like wat
#####: hand skidding
$$$$$: wanking
$$$$$: lol
#####: ahahahaa
#####: lol
#####: lol
#####: wankin with mojo
#####: lol
#####: guys dey always have dat ting
$$$$$: i dont know
#####: on phone unda d rug
#####: in d kitchen
$$$$$: whatever thats his own problem
#####: dey are all sex perverts
$$$$$: there was some guy i quaved and he didnt come and then he was like oh that he'll satisfy himself
#####: no he didnt
#####: bastard
$$$$$: and then i was like how..he said well he'll just do the hand job himself
$$$$$: and i said ok, i'll like to watch
$$$$$: it was quite disgusting,i almost threw up.
$$$$$: lying there and a guy making all those noises just by touching himself????
$$$$$: that sucks
#####: $$$$$ am dead
$$$$$: y?
#####: am embarrassing myself in d cafe
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: how
#####: no be wetin u want see be dat
#####: d guy is an idiot
$$$$$: nah i don't think i'll want to again
$$$$$: i was quite upset
#####: is his hand betadan urs
#####: y did u want to see in d first place
#####: eeewwwwwwwwwww
$$$$$: curiousity
#####: did he come on his own hand
$$$$$: i didnt watch that part oh
$$$$$: where else did he want to come..on my body?
#####: maybe on ur breast
#####: lollllllllllllll
$$$$$: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
#####: lol
#####: or on ur face
$$$$$: please
$$$$$: am getting sick
#####: nw u licking it n al dat will get him off again
#####: lol
#####: it ll make u fresh lol
$$$$$: abeg jo
$$$$$: for me once am satisfied thats it.i dont care about the guy
$$$$$: sometimes i feel bad but then once am turned off i find it difficult to even touch the guy
#####: oh gal evendat satisfaction dos nt cum easily
#####: its like am in a race i have to get dere b4 him
#####: cos once he is dere dey bcum useless
$$$$$: true
#####: and d tin bcums extr tiny
#####: bt den wen i get dere he cn do anytin
#####: at times he is even d one holding my hand
#####: he brings d cream and al dat cos my heart is neva in it
$$$$$: why?
$$$$$: lol
#####: why wat?
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: does he hold ur hand?
#####: yeah cos he wa nts it faster and my wrist wld av been paining me
#####: his eyes will be closed and i ll jst be staring at d ceiling or rolling my eyeballs or just rubbin his head
#####: d day i discoverd his balls i tink d session bcame shorter
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: lol
$$$$$: thats too funny
$$$$$: poor boy
#####: yeah yeah
#####: dnt pity him oh
$$$$$: why now
#####: u are nt dere when in d morning or afta drinkin it takes him like an hour to get off
#####: ibo dem hard pass yoruba
$$$$$: i no sabi
#####: ahh in d morning d guy will wake me up with bad erection
#####: lookin at me with pleading eyes
#####: cos he knows i like my sleep
$$$$$: lol
#####: blieve me
#####: ti 7 ko ba knack
#####: d guy neva rest
#####: i like bt wen we start havin sex is it d way he is thrusting into my hand dat he will enter mi
#####: o ma pa mi
$$$$$: the last guy for me he said his dick was hard all through the night and woke me up in the middle of the night
$$$$$: i wanted to slap him
#####: its u nah
$$$$$: brb

She came back but there had been enough time to get back to cleaner sturvs...

hmmph

I know I said I like it small but not that small..not pint size..hmmpffhh

Naija Muziqcians

Am not too much a big fan of music,but since i love to dance and am a good dancer at that{check me out this friday} :its always important for me to keep abreast of the music industry. Recently, I have actually been buying instead of pilfering other people's cd's...and I just want to mention a few here..These are albums released in the past one year..new names and old ones..groups and solos...

STYL PLUS- someone told me their new album wasn't worth it, but I always like to have my own opinion so I got my copy yesterday and endeavoured to listen to it..I have not stopped since then..Apart from my HUSTLE DVD..thats my best buy this week..I have a bad habit of picking a favourite song and actually neglecting the ones after it..so I have only actually stopped at track 6.. 'Four years', 'if you go', 'Mi o ba e sere mo' and 'I no wan trouble' are nice but my best is still 'Beautiful ladies'..The album may not be as catchy as the last one but it is cool for the suave.

ROOFTOPMCs-not my best of naija duos but "SILENCE" is just my flavour..."razz"..Lagi mo feat Cobhams is good music to my ear and I honestly must say Cobhams eyes would just have been an accessory..he is awesome.Which brings me to "Miss Jailer"

ASA- nobody needs to tell you she is doing well..I don't know which got more popularity between her album and Alapomeji's..but I must commend her for packing an album full of tight music..she doesnt just entertain like most of our so called musicians..ASA MAKES GOOD MUSIC...settled in France, she seems to me more like an International star with Nigerian roots and she needs no cannabis to give me the crazy look I love..All her tracks are engraved in my skull but "AWE" is just my best..360 and Subway also great for me..My brother is still single oh incase..

9ice- I am going for a "night with 9ice" even if I am grounded for a year..thats to show what is reigning..Since he has gone and married..I won't want to wax sentimental but what he lacks in look to me he makes for in local n razzy..I have a friend who can't function without listening to 9ice first thing in the morning..just as coffee is to some so is 9ice to Kemizole...

LARA GEORGE- I actually bought this album thinking she was the one that did "Heritage" but the album grew on me after some repeated playing (to justify my 150)..my best track is "Forever in my heart" remix ft Cobhams Asuquo...and that song does get to me..The other songs are just there..

IKECHUKWU-Is he still with Storms Record or is he now with Mo Hits cos their parole have really entered each other..he shows up in their videos(and almost every other artist's)..wine am well is ok(and dat lady did whine oh)..he is not exactly the best rap artist but his rhymes are ok even though his lyrics are not dat deep..just peripheral and its all about the kokolets..his videos though are becoming more of a Mo Hits affair and am not very comfortable with that.

NAETO C-What is his P? I don't know what the fuss is about him but he doesn't really click with me..By the way is he Ikechukwu's brother? They share the same head structure.

BANKY W- of the Wellington boots..y didn't they let him sing Ebutte Metta at this day festival,maybe Rhianna would have acknowles82ldged his remix..The whole album doesn't really appeal to me and seems to me he may be trying to lean on the fineboy singing R n B thingy(he reminds me of Craig David,who is much better though) and that is cliche..

N:B- On a totally unrelated note,am I the only one who has noticed the heartfelt look of love on Peter or is it Paul's face in The Video"Ifunanya"..the one with the white durag on that was twisting with the girl..I heard one of them is dating the girl..i dont know whether its true oh but with their cute faces, Physique and wallet I wish it was me.To Be Continued**********

Three Things I saw Today

1. A young man walking in front of me on the overhead bridge, was wearing a white t-shirt, jean and slippers..you will ask whats special but under the white t-shirt was a white-turned-brown-singlet that was showing under..he was sagging his jeans so i could see his black boxer and he had no belt on the equally dirty jean, so he was busy trying to grab his crotch from the front to keep the jean on..while also walking in a swagger meant to impress..and I pondered to myself..what's all the sagging craze about?..its an act of irresponsibility..what if its a girl's pant showing that way..they will call her a bitch won't they?Why should a man's singlet and boxers(in essence,underwear) be showing under his ohter clothings and to think that's what three-quarter of our men think is fashion now..

2.On my way to magodo, a lady of my age drove past me, she had dreadlocks..the small ones i once had before, she actually looked like me and for once i saw someone who had a little bit of resemblance to me..by the time I got to magodo, she drove past me again...you will be thinking what's the moral of the story.."She was Driving a Hummer Jeep!!!"..lol..Maybe thats why I saw a resemblance.

3.Well the day is not over yet.......................

UPDATE ON DEXTER*

Dexter* has not called since my birthday but he has been sending my cousins to me to tell me he misses me..and na all of una sabi..Dexter* is just a friend oh he is just a friend...

Old Thots on Service Year

This is one of the rare nights,when we are gifted with light where I am doing my youth service.Phcn is a small god here and you do not waste whatever time they have decided to give you light.Here I am,having ironed all i could possibly iron;my phone is charged to the brim and i even removed the battery and put it back so that it could fill any small space left in the battery.At times we go three days without light,often times,a week. Due to this,i have not been able to spend a weekend in town.I always plan to do but when its friday,i just pack a bag and find somewhere to go.Am glad for the light tonite,its the first time this month that i would be using my fan,laptop,iron and blogging from home.

MY NYSC EXPERIENCE SO FAR

What exactly is Youth Service all about?After struggling through so many lectures,cranky and overbearing lecturers;you make me go to a camp,where the soldiers take delight in visiting the sins of their leaders on us.They claim it is a paramilitary training.Is Nigeria going to war?Are all able youths been recruited?Why don't they carry those idle miscreants or AREA boys and take them for paramilitary training?why is it those of us that have spent years waiting to start a job and fend for ourselves that get to waste a whole year? You would even think they would take good care of us..nope..in camp we lived in terrible conditions.A secondary school hastily turned to camp was our lodging(Only God knows where they packed the students to for the three weeks).We were regularly attacked in the female hostel by the indigenes,especially after we had been paid allowances.By allowance,i mean bicycle allowance and all those measly allowances.I dint even deign it fit to go the dinning,but those who ate camp food rarely had anything good to say.Either the stew was wack or the bread small or the rice clumpy..it was always one bad meal after the other. The training was fun initially,i mean i marched back in my secondary school days,am a sportswoman..i jog,play lawn tennis and volleyball;as a matter of fact i singlehandedly played all my platoon games,until i fell ill and they lost.Training got sour around the second week when it seemed we were always been punished for one thing or the other,especially when the (handsome)commandant felt like.I had all sort of sicknesses in the second week so it became easy for me to escape the drills.I had malaria,nasal infection,i couldnt go to the toilet(which wasn't a toilet per say,but the bush);i began to dread the sound of the bingle,bungle or whatever they call it that they blow to wake us up:lets just say it was a terrible time. The nights were easier as a lot of my school mates were in the same camp with me..I had plenty of my friends too;Eni Ife,Damilola,Tbells,Femi..i made new friends..Wasted,Bugzy,T.P and a host of people and hanging out at the mammy market was fun;I could equate it to being at Reloaded or any other club..We had the guiness stand where we got all our drinks..since the water there had a horrible taste,coke became water,smirnoff was doing the work of coke..most of us developed a higher alchohol tolerance cos there was nothing else to take.The dj was not too good,i think he only had about 2 or 3 cds;but Timaya had just released his album and we didnt mind hearing it over and over. My platoon leader was 'Action'. A short but very agile soldier.His assistant Oga Bello,is what i would refer to as Babyface Aboki.He pronounced his f as p and the guy who dared to correct spent a good while in the guard room.I enjoyed my platoon cos it was just fun and we really never did so much.I was nicknamed Jamaica,immediately i joined because of my dreadlocks.The first person i met in my platoon was Shamishu,short for Shamshudeen i guess.He was a naughty nuisance,he used to send a boy out to buy him six cans of heineken everyday,he smoked much and struck me as a "rich yaro".He had a friend Yusuf,that was so tall and had long feet,he definately did not get his size in the jungle boots.One of my room mates really like him but she found out that Yusuf had started marriage rites before coming to camp;with that long feet,i pity the girl who gets him(if you know what i mean). All in all,camp was fun and i really felt bad and empty the day we all left because i had come across a lot of people with different backgrounds,upbringing,beliefs and behaviours. I had made friends and of course pissed off some people.I had a chubby toaster,who chained smoke, that dogged my footsteps around camp.i had a wonderful guy that supported me from home and gave me a wonderful surprise even when i was in camp.I moved closer to my friends.I was almost too popular cos of my hairdo,even though i wanted to lay low.I finished all my man'o'war tasks and walked to and fro during endurance trek(my feet can still tell the tale).It is,despite all odds;an experience i won't mind repeating again.Corper Wi oh

Dexter*

Dexter* the Emperor Musabo of Qua'anpan(pronounced Kwanpan); where he is doing his Service is 5feet sumtin tall and I met him on my way back to Lagos from Akure. His most prominent feature is perhaps his afro and then of course his brash personality.He is fun to be around and has a bottomless well of humor. Another feature I can't seem to get past is his Lower lip(Think Angelina jolie's but a bit plumper):not that have sampled it ohhhhhh..Anyways, we spent two days or so together at my cousin's home..He is my cousin's friend...Been with Dexter is just like been in "a nite of thousand laughs": Fun all the way..the first day, it was as if I had met him since 24yrs ago.We talked and talked and talked and it was awesome..That night when I went to bed(Yes i did & alone),I began to feel the first stirrings of attraction.It has really been a long while since I particularly felt close or chatty with anyone.The guys have being meeting are either boring, irritating or compulsively attentive. Dexter is none of the above. When he first entered the car, he had a bottle of Eva filled with an odd concotion and he claimed it was sepe, opa eyin and all those other things;I later discovered that it was Two bottles of Malta Guiness and a bottle of coke and fanta. In my mind, I thought what a nincompoop..Now that nincompoop, is a friend who is sensitive, touchy and heartwarmingly charming..I knew he was supposed to leave after a night but he stayed for another day..today he has had his bath and was on his way out of the door, when I told him I was going to miss him and if he stayed another day I will dedicate a page to him on my blog..well he is behind me now trying to read my blog now. Anyway, you never know where you can make a good friend so always give everyone a chance to be themselves or express themselves..I have been extremely nasty and rude in the past but I have come to realise that for me to have friends who still care about me despite all my shortcomings;I also deserve to give people a chance to be themselves and you never know what personality you might like..forget all those sanguine personlity and things.
Dexter*-not real name.

Me and Dem

Am not a particularly romantic person, so am always impressed with myself when I manage to do something that actually passes for romantic or sexy. My friends can vouch for that. I am a grouch when it comes to love n stuff and am not particular comfortable with romantic gestures or emotional thingys..I prefer straightforward, lets get down to business and what exactly are we doing kind of approach to relationship. My only actual problem is that I succumb easily to good music, I don't mean the hip hop, rap or reggae genre..i mean slow-love songs. Whenever I hear one, I always feel like "having someone" and I am saying that in the most christian sense.
Back to my point, truly opposites attract abi what did I do to attract the exact type of men, I will rather avoid? The weepy, clingy and possesive type. Personally, I don't mind if my man does not call me more than once a day-if he is away or we are not together..and a 2-3min call should do, but I had to get the one who can talk for over 2 hours..without even taking a sip of water. Opinionated people generally have a lot to say..A hug or two is ok (if we haven't seen in days) but when it becomes protracted especially in a public place, I take it that it means am really looking good and people are eyeing me and wondering what am doing with you..but clinging shows you probably have low confidence and you are thinking she just might leave if you don't latch on..
A dear N unsuccessful toaster once asked me if I could kiss my boyfriend in public..I said yes..infact I have been known to give a peck or two but only if it came with the flow or if I was in the mood..but if it not...nope..some guys ask for a kiss in public..kilode..did they just notice you had lips or your lip gloss may be strawberry flavoured..I know some ladies may not agree with me on this point but personally I dislike public show of affection..i don't do it and i don't like to see it..it makes think the girl is feeling insecure or handing out hands-off warnings to other ladies around..it can be an ugly thing..
And the weepy oh the weepy..who brought that calamity upon me?..me, myself and I..my snappy, unloving, uncaring, unromantic self..everything makes him cry..Maybe its a medical defect..maybe i should refer his case to GREY'S ANATOMY. I don't want to dwell on this cos it makes me "eew".. On a cheerful note, I came across this joke and thought to share oh..i stored it somewhere but I can't seem to find it..O dabo..
N:B- please note that all these are my own personal opinions and preferences..if u no c am dat wa, na ur own b dat..

Happy birthday to me

ITS MY BIRTHDAY..
sorry i have not written for sometime...am just to lazy and most of the time i have been mobile..but i promiswe to post all my backlog of notes...Wish me Good Dancing as I proceed to Step in the name of Love....Am out to the Island oh.."let's go thereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"

YIPPEE

i don't particularly have anything to write but i just spent 200 naira on ticket so i get to write something.Am happy cos naija finally qualified for final in soccer..after a seriously dismal performance at the olympics..we really need this medals..by the time they finish sharing for everyone on the team..it will make up for the rest..tennis,athletics,field events and others.
I wonder how long we are goin to continue been plagued by our lack of preparation, improper funding and general demoralisation of everybody..Anyway,i have to go and lie down,i seem to have caught a severe bout of cold...due to windy weather and bad cologne in this cafe..al this yahoo dudes really need to ease up on this things...

Sigh of Relief

Finally,after all these stressful and gruelling months..i have finally finished my primary assignment..need I tell you how good I felt to finally be free!!!!phew...In a couple of days and posts i will be debriefing you about my experience as a corper in Awolowo's home town..you will think by that alone that I will have had a pleasant time in the place..IRO nla..For the first few days when I got there,the light barely came on so I felt it was just Nepa being themselves but after a couple of weeks i learnt how the timetable..One day in two weeks for you to charge your phones,iron your clothes,pump water if you are priviledged to have a pumping machine or finally finish that movie you have borrowed since d other two weeks ago..am sure there video clubs dont get angry for late return..Anyway lets just say i adapted fast..and made do with my candle and novels(Thank God am an avid reader)
By the way,this just happens to be my Birthday month and am thinkin of just the perfect new hair do and have got it..this week i just may be posting new looks of me..if God grants me the 3500 i need to waltz into "make me" for a make-over.
Will keep you posted for real..

N.B..What makes a man cry? And how can you stop a man who cries too much from doing so..how do you delicately say "you have to be a man" or "your tears don't move me"..I need frank advice soon cos am too rude a person to stand dis for long..

Life is not so sweet oh

Have been away for sometime now..handling my business and getting ripped off..first a student dies in an accident after an outing,and the wonderfully irrational indigenes felt we(corpers and teachers) were the murderers and came after the school in a rampage..the aftermath been that i had to run like i had not in a long time, and eventually when that didnt work out; i had to hide in a bush..i think a snake came down on me so i had to run out and keep running again.. I lost my Nokia E61 and had to pay 5000 to get that and my sim back..and to think that i thought i was going to finish NySc without any spectacular event..I know this all sounds colourful but believe me it was that bad..they had all sort of jazzy phizzle..the emphasis been on the jazz(if you know what I mean).
After that comes the Teacher's strike which made me seriously 'idle' but fortunately for me i stumbled artfully into a movie outing and a visit to Taqwa Bay..least to say i had a little fun out of the whole strike and at least i could wake up whenever i wanted..no Assembly,moral talk, floggin my students..my arms and limbs have had a well deserved rest..
The downside of it all is that am absolutely and unequivocally (permit the big grammar) B*R*O*K*E..the type with the Big Letters..since school is on strike,no visible help from there and did i mention that I no longer worry my parents for anything apart from transport and feeding and dressing and pin money and church money..lol..just kidding but i had to make do cos I spent the money I had on an outfit for a party i didnt end up attending (cos it be small boys party..mo de ti n pe nle) and believe me i have no one to blame but my greedy self..living above my means..I mean am just a teacher for Christ's sake.
Anyway in case you have not been to the movies to see PROM NIGHT then you don't know what you are missing and I suggest you find yourself a way to get there and see it..not every movie comes out looking nice in all those pirated 7 or 22 in 1 dvds' peeps are fond of buying..why don't you treat yourself and feel the beauty of the movie with the ambience and all the sound effects..(yeah, I know I sound like a bad advertorial

I got a text message from my childhood boyfriend..I quote:
'Imitation is limitation.Procastination is the fertilizer that makes difficulties grow.
Living a double life will get you nowhere twice as fast.Adversity has its advantages.
Know your limits,then ignore them.The only place to start is where you are.
There is no future in the past.Do what people say cant be done.'
Is he trying to pass a message..say for instance; am I procastinating to get back with him or marry him..cos I can recall certain proposals..Am I living a double life? dating someone else while am with him,but I guess the point is there is no future in the past so I have to face the present. Or was he just trying to inspire me? I don't think so..For some reason he spent 10# getting that to me.Couldnt he just have said ''Hi, S'alafia lo wa''?

Dear friends and accquintance,if you know or hear of any place,company,organisation or bank where they are taking C.V's from fresh graduates or graduates at all..please contact me cos Am seriously looking for a job anywhere..obviously am cut out for any kind of hustling..if I wasn't am sure I will be so broke cos I won't approach it with the same aggresion that I do for everything..anyways just to let people know I am Hunting.I must just draw the line at any kind of sales job,sourcing for funds kind of job(unless the fund is for I),I am not a sycophant and i do not want to wheedle or beg for any favours..i prefer to make my own way..hmmm.
As if it's not bad enough that am searching for a job..am now searching for 'him'..my father is always listening to me attentively and eagerly waiting for me to drop hints about a boyfriend or a fiance..its not like am not eager but for the fact that i really don't want to hear the words ; committment...engagement..affianced..marriage..wedlock..matrimony(whether holy or unholy); permit me to say there is nothing i enjoy more than a wedding ceremony except of course a birthday party..but am still cool with been the bridesmaid - all the grooms men are eyeing..by the time i become the bride..no one go eye me oh..and dat situation go harsh wella. Moreso, when the criteria for even getting a man is so high..is it the Genotype matter? AS or SS or AA..i just happen to be ''ZZ''..How are you to know if he is HIV free(not dat am discriminating)but if you don't have it;its better to stay that way..what of the tribal issue..i won't mention what my family will not accept but it really limits my search horizon..Everyone expects me to bring back something from NYSC..is it my fault the corpers there have names i can't even pronounce..gbamgbumgbum and all sorts of names..anyway there is even no man out there to match my high standards..but am still looking anyway(Ugly Guys need not APPLY)..Application closes in the next one year..Thanks.
P.S :-To my B*eautiful, B*uxom, C*harismatic , C*urvy, G*enerous, God*-fearing, H*omely, I*ntelligent, L*ovely, M*otherly, S*exy and ''H*A*P*P*I*L*Y '' Married Cousin ''Seyi Dairo'' oops Jolayemi...Its' high time you bring that Opon back home because we are missing you and i need you to come and help me find ''Him''.Ay, b4 you start to vex i remember you too oh..Bros ii eeee..na so you carry Seyi go..hmmm..odabooo.

Wifey to Be

There is something giving me a lot of concern...A lot of things do, but this matter is special..Ever since i passed a certain age into adolescence, i have come to realise i do not like domestic chores. At first, it wasnt so obvious because we had someone living with us who was doing most of the chores and then i had four almost unruly brothers whom my mother saw it fit to give some of the chores to. So most of my growing years saw me been nonchalant. Am sure you are wondering where I am going to with all this bladderdash..Well here it is..Am of a marriageable age,as a matter of fact am giving myself two or three years to put things in place and of course find the right man or vice versa and am good to go. How do i get over the fact that every time my parents have the opening they lament about my lack of domestication.. Is it my fault i ll rather be on my pc or watching or reading..is it my fault am rarely hungry..is it my fault that i do not like eating some specific food much..say Amala,Semovita...these meals preclude a lot of stress,time and sweating and have come to realise by the time you have finished cooking them you have lost your own appetite..The only meal i do not mind exerting myself over is POUNDED YAM. I absolutely love that food and i could take it every goddamn day of the week.Everyone in my house shares a passion for the food and its the one meal where we can all come and put our hands together to prepare. Back to my musing, whats going to happen really in these next few years when i take the huge leap..am i suddenly going to find myself domesticated or is my husband going to cover up for me but producing a helpmate...I want to believe that when its time i will definitely come around and as it is i can't allow my own personal enviroment to go to pieces..And i can't have my man looking at me like a S**B.. That been said i think i need to make an effort to clear around now..psheew..

Grey's or should i say *** Anatomy

Finally, I have progressed from Season 1 of Grey's Anatomy to Season 2. Considering that am one who doesnt and can't stand blood;I am impressed with myself. Grey has managed to sideline Desperate Housewive Season 4 on my priority list. Am incredibly surprised that am even hooked on any Series or Seasonal thing,i was never one to stick to any project, but having finished Sex And The City Season 3,4,5; Everybody hates chris 1,2,3; Desperate housewives 1,2,3,; Grey's Anatomy 1; am beginning to find these an expensive hobby. Buying these Dvds at the rate of 300 naira, sometimes 350 naira is really draining. My allowance is meager at most, and as i always say "The Streets Are Not Smiling". That all said i would rather not recharge my phone, but i must definitely buy whatever is the next season and where i can i get people to buy it for me under the pretext of not being able to get it around. Back to Grey's Anatomy....have you ever rebelled against something..thinking you were going to hate it;only to discover you L*O*V*E it..i hate to admit but my DVD man actually tried to sell Grey to me so many times that he finally gave up when i threatened to stop coming to his stall..What prompted this was the fact that i had to go back and thank him..it hurts but i also had to buy Season 2 and he happens to sell the best Dvds' around. As i said before i hate blood and Gore..i thought Grey was going to involve a lot of medical jargon and extremely bloody operations..Yes it is bloody but the SEXUAL tension in the OR is so thick you can barely even remember that you are watching an operation. There is so much hormone on rampage,the intrigue is crazy, the suspense is so thick you can cut it with a knife. Do i need to talk about DR. Mc Dreamy(Patrick Dempsey)..dreamy and slumberous eyes..the tough but obviously sensitive DR. Burke(ISAIAH WASHINGTON)..sexy Meredith Grey..pretty model-DR. Izzie Stevens..the stupidly clumsy George O'Malley..Arrogant Alex Karev; whose disappointments always leave me happy..Christina Yang so tough but clueless..The Nazi;DR. Bailey..ohmiGod..she is so nasty and her attitude is so sassy..but you need to see her breakdown when she was labouring and found out her husband was lying in the operating theatre with his brain open. Apparently he had been in accident..and there was a live bomb next door under Meredith's hand.(sorry if am blabbing).
My excuse for not watching Prison break;what exactly is it with this prison thing..heard when girls heard WentWorth Miller was dead they started wailing..isnt that a bit extreme..its bad enough people sometimes miss lectures and classes,some don't even get up to empty their bladder until its almost too late.. anyway as i was saying my excuse for not following Prison break was that i didnt want to be addicted to anything but i must am as good as hooked...well after Grey am going for "Hustle"..those bunch of hustlers..if i watch it through and through i will definitely try some of the stunts pulled off by those guys(i can't believe I am dropping off to sleep..I will just round up this episode and maybe 1 more..1 more for the road..cheers

Sunday was my niece's one year old birthday,which was just convienent cos i was on my last thousand bucks and in my house,you can't run errands without making something of em. So you can be sure i was glad to haul my ass down to my brother's crib in Lagos. The only problem i had was that no matter what you do,you cannot escape those mosquitoes. They seem to be everywhere.Not that am living in a slum,as a matter of fact,the area is respectably upscale,no bush or dump around,which makes me wonder where the mosquitoes reside.

Back to my gist,the party wasn't even supposed to happen;it was meant to be a parlour thing.Trust my sister-in-law to call up her friends,my brother called his AND i called mine.Unfortunately,most of my friend were regrettably out of Lagos,but the least one i expected to be in Lagos was fortunately around and she more than made up for the absence of others(Thanks Kenny for coming)Kenny is my awesome,attractive and caring female friend.

Anyway,the party turned out to be a gathering of old friends and new friends and i had some serious fun:there was enough chops and "Booze",which was essential of course.I of course missed my dear friend "Black Buck" who is fortunately for him and unfortunately for me: out of the country...Will talk more about him sometimes but LANRE in case you read this,i miss you so much..this post is for you cos i want you to know how the party went.There was a whole lot of Man utd n chelsea talk and am sure you would have enjoyed it.

It's been one of those days when you wonder what exactly are you doing? what's your purpose? what does the future hold? Am not trying to be melancholic but my present location affords me ample time and space to ponder on my life. Have some of the steps have taken been the right one? Am i holding on to some things for the right or wrong reason? Do i hide behind religion instead of facing my fears? I must confess it is daunting when i realise i do not have the answers to these QUESTIONS...In all these,i have come to the realization that I am here for a purpose. I may not be the most religious of people,but i have my head screwed on tight. I don't do drugs,am disease free,am not fine neither am I ugly:As a fact am fearfully and wonderfully made.With God by my side and my family ever loving,i know my destiny is bright and the future is awesome. I thank God for the gift of special friends....Holla

THE STREET JUST HAS TO START SMILING SOON*********DON'T FORCE IT TO SMILE

Bored

Things are a bit Slow in Lagos..D streets are HArsh..its like no matter what you do you can't seem to make money..

Welcome

aptly titled "welcome" my first note will be..y? If nobody greets me, i go greet maself..simple..dis may be the only time i will make reference to this but don't ever ask me what i do for the next few months..right now thats the most irritable question i think i can get from anyone..

Forgive my lack of punctuation,i may have read English while in School bt e no get effect on the way i right or talk sef..a friend who read classics actually took me to task(am i right) about the way i pronounced "grouch" this morning..since i couldnt rewind and listen to myself,i wondered if i had pronounced my ch as shh..i guess she was just feeling groushy..

What do i talk about on this my first post? do you see me in my picture gazing out of a Brt bus..yeah..i ll talk about that..the Brt may not be filled with as much drama as your standard MOLUE bus..hold up i need to catch a bite..yeah yum..i luv bugon..

MY FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH THE BRT

i had just gotten into Lagos from my place of primary posting of how do they say it..and i was heading to my brother's-wife's-mum's place(you get the gist)in Surulere..touching down at Ojota on my flight NDDC..i thot it was just a simple matter of hopping on Ojuelegba bus and dropping and den anoda bus to aguda..To my surprise..for the first time,the road was traffic free..i could only see private vehicles..wat a joyful sight..

my joy was dimmed when i realise how far i had to walk to the nearest bus stop..in my ignorance,i joined the queue thinking i was going to get my ticket at the mouth of the bus like they do in Ghana(have only been dere once).to my surprise i was bounced to the end of the queue and i had to start all over again after purchasing a 50naira ticket to fadeyi..dats where 50 naira expires,whereas the normal yellow bus takes me to ojuelegba with the same 50naira..dat was my second problem..the third was realising that a lot of people were standing on the queue because they did not want to stand on the bus..

Knowing Lagos,i wasnt surprised to see another queue had formed for those who were willing to stand..i joined them..my oh my..was it a bumpy ride..yes it was..within a minute of taking offf,i was grappling with the hand hokks and flaying all over..if not for the handsome young man behind me(dnt think it was bcos of him,i was flaying al over)nope..it wasnt all because of him..lol.

Anyway,let me mention the good part,you get to listen to 2face or 9ice,as the driver prefers,and of course the seats are not yet torn..the bells are still in good working condition..you get dropped at your own right bus stop..and have not been mugged neither is there any risk of one-chance..so for now ,i stick to the BRT and hope they do something about the queues that form at the tiny bus stops..especially at ketu..you need to see bankers getting drenched in the morning when it is raining..

anyway let me sign up by saying am glad i created a blog at this point when am extremely bored and sorely undertasked..i can say i was inspired when i saw TRUE LOVE magazine's interview of some female bloggers..most striking to me is BIMBYLAD..keep it up gal and me dey feel u oh..holla

cheers and steer clear of what you won't gain from